Career Failure: Rebuild Yourself

CAREER FAILURE: REBUILD YOURSELF

The anatomy of failure

Many people use to say that in long run a failed person will get stronger, but in short run there are few things worse than feeling that we have failed. A failure use to feel violated, guilty, depressed, angry, vengeful, lethargic, impotent, destroyed, betrayed, terrified and sometimes relieved and resolute.

Career failure is unlike any other loss; it is sudden, brutal destruction of self esteem. Normally this time of period known and remembered as being badly disordered.

The stage of failure forces a person to accept the loss and prepare for the task of rebuilding. They are:

(i) Shock

(ii) Fear

(iii) Anger and blame

(iv) Shame

(v) Despair

Shock

Shock, is the first stage of failure and widely characterized by an initial state of numbness and disbelief, giving way to the awareness of terrible blow. To deal with any terrible blow, the person needs to do nothing and try to absorb it.

When a person lost his or her job, the first reaction will be disbelief, shock and numbness. It does happen so sudden! Very fast! It's like a worse surgery with no preparation and anesthesia. So, it is a worse mistake if any major decision was taken during this period. During the shock period, the victim needs a sympathetic listener, not someone who will offer advice. So, whenever a shock occurs, it is safer to do nothing except wait and allow the pain to recede.

Fear

Close to the heels of shock comes the fear. Fears are quite specific and appropriate, but they escalate quickly and unmanageable proportions. Fear is a survival mechanism alerting the mind to danger of life. But when a fear metamorphoses into nameless readmits use ceases. Specific fears (like 'how to pay bills?') are useful and unfocused fears are paralyzing. Inner approach such as meditation is helpful for some people who are in a fear after losing the job him or her desire deeply. For others, confronting the fears can bring relief.

Anger and blame

When a person gets angry after getting fired is a healthy response as long as it is a passing stage. It's a sign of a person value him or herself. Some people never get angry. From fear they fall in to despair.

People who skip anger have a harder time to recover. But, strong anger can lead to destructive action which can harm the people who cause them losing their job. Extreme anger also causes mental illness such as sleeplessness, irritability and frustration.

Blame is a logical response to an unexpected cause, even

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