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Peanut Butter and Jelly: The Quest for Food

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Jeremy Gummelt

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Peanut Butter and Jelly: The Quest For Food

In today's tumultuous times, a person is often fortunate to be able to eat good food and defend themselves against extreme starvation. Never has this been more true than when it comes to peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. The texture of the peanut butter, the flavoring of the jelly, the softness of the bread as they fall prey to the ravenous teeth that sink into their surface and pull them into the hungry mouth of the consumer. Witness now the guidelines to fashioning this hunger breaking meal in all its glory and majesty.

For one to properly fashion a sandwich of any pedigree, one must acquire bread. This can be a very time consuming process, as wheat takes several weeks to grow in the field on top of the time it takes to grind it into powder and bake it to freshness at 350 degrees farenheit in a stone oven. One can bake it in other ovens, but a stone oven is ideal for the purpose of creating tasty bread. If this does not suit the reader, do not despair! The local supermarket or convenience store routinely supplies bread grown and baked by others with the spare time to accomplish this daunting task. Peanut butter and jelly sandwiches are capable of being fashioned of wheat, white, rye, sourdough, garlic, and grain breads, but for the purpose of this paper, honey wheat bread has been selected for its marvelous ability to combine with and enhance the flavors of the contents it is soon to hold. Once the bread has been gathered by whatever means necessary, it is important to remember that a minimum of two slices approximately an inch tall apiece and at least five inches in width are ideal. If one's bread does not match these dimensions, it is okay. The sandwich is still possible. Separate these two slices side by side, preferably on a paper plate or spread out napkin. Once the bread has been configured properly side by side, the next goal of the quest may be pursued.

Peanut butter is perhaps the ambrosia of the Earth. All manner of creatures big and small enjoy peanut butter and humans are no exception to this standard. Peanut butter comes in a number of textures from smooth to crunchy, somewhere between, and even mixed with jelly already. If one does not have a plot of peanut plants and a handy sickle or machete, it would be best to gather it from the store at the same time one collects their bread, if purchasing bread was chosen as a better option. If not, then now one must go to the store if there is no peanut butter is handy. While on the subject, ensure that one also has an ample supply of jelly while there. It does not help fight off intense hunger to always be leaving the house to go fetch supplies for a sandwich. Once the peanut butter has been selected for flavor (this paper has chosen to go with smooth peanut butter for simplicity), select a butter knife or a spoon from the handy utensil holder. If there is no spoon or knife available, a fork or spatula can be used with some difficulty and great care. Upon acquiring the tool, it may be necessary to use it to open the jar of peanut butter. If so, take a firm edge of the utensil (in this case a butter knife) and carefully cut the plastic trapping the lid to the jar, but be cautious! Do not cut the jar or the lid itself or else the peanut butter will not be solidly protected once the cap has been placed back upon the jar. Once the plastic wrapper has been removed, place one hand on the jar and another hand on the lid. With both hands, twist the jar to the right while turning the lid to the left. This will take some pressure so do not give up if the lid does not come off easily. The lid must be tightly placed to protect the peanut butter from the elements and retain its freshness. Once the lid has been removed, resist the urge to lick the underside of it! While the peanut butter reside left on the lid may be appealing, it may cause problems later and ruin the rest of the jar while it sits in the cabinet. Set the lid aside and take the knife. Dip it into the creamy tan goodness and scoop out a reasonable amount of peanut butter onto the utensil. Cautiously withdraw the knife and take it to the bread, which should be within arm's reach. Draw the knife along the bread with the peanut butter touching the surface of it; this will result in the peanut butter being smeared onto the surface of the bread and the second step in successfully fashioning a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Attempt to use only one piece of bread and under no circumstances use both sides. Once the peanut butter has been placed on one side of the slice of bread, it is where it belongs and to put some on the other side would get peanut butter all over your hands later and make them sticky. This can present some very serious problems! Once the peanut butter has been placed on the bread in a satisfactory amount, feel free to lick

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